I've never understood...

When my parents was told they was pregnant with me, they were shock as much as Keith and I was with Spencer, my parents got married when my mom was Three Months pregnant with me. Mother had a daughter name April, my Dad had a daughter name Felicia already. Growing up I thought I only had one sister, that was April, we use to get along, but we are now two totally different people, we have our moments and our fights, but I'll always love her, she's always there when I need to run too. She's gifted me with a gorgeous nephew I care so much about, and love like he's my own. I spoil him as much as I do my own Son.
The fact I'm getting too,... I never knew about my other sister till I was 13 year of age, I was going through Family Pictures one day with Daddy in floor, I seen another random girl in this picture, I said, "Daddy who's this?" I could tell he knew this day was coming. He explain to me my older sister walk out on us when she was young. I'm sure not many people know that I've never gotten along with any of my grandparents, I'm not proud of it, but it's made me a stronger person today. For years, I wonder what she was like, what time of person she was, who she was? I remember looking online for her, but she was not even online at all. One day, my parents and I went out to eat and my mom pointed someone out, it was my sister's mother and brother. I then knew her mom, I've known her awhile at Gville highschool. As much as I wanted to walk up and be like,"Hey!", I didn't. After Keith and I started dating, one of my ole friends said, "Do you have a sister name Felicia?" I couldn't help but look at her, she had a confuse look on her face, I said, "Yes, but we don't talk about it growing up." No one knew much about her, other then she got mad at my grandparents and dad. Jealousy happen between my sisters. I was only One year old. I felt like I was blame my entire life that it was my fault she left. My parents told me otherwise, it was her choice. But I still feel like it's something to do with me. My friend said, "Her mom said your sister has been trying to find you." Of course in my mind I thought, I been in the same house for 20 years, and I've had the same house number for 20 years. Of course I took the chance, hoping I could finally meet this stranger! The entire time I was pregnant, I enjoy texting her. Getting to know who she was, she always said I can't wait to finally see you again. Heck I couldn't wait to finally meet her! Even to meet her nephew Spencer. When Spencer was born, I expected her to show up at the hospital, but she didn't. Our text got a little slow and rare. I thought I did something or said something wrong. I ask her on fathers day if she wanted to meet dad and I out to eat, she never showed up or even contact me back. Now as of today, I realize her mother deleted me off facebook, and also blocked me. I'm hurt. I'm hurt the fact it was all a lie and set up possibly. I'm sad after opening up to her telling her how I felt for 20 years not having her in my life, she just up and vanish again. It hurts so bad not having a sibling not wanting anything to do with you. Of course it also hurt my dad too. :(
My sister April told me it was all a lie, and set up, she's just trying to break your heart, and cause issues. Maybe I should of listen to her, but I couldn't get the fact out, she's also my sister and I want give her a chance. But now as I'm sitting here playing with Spencer, she's really hurt me. She's hurt me for 21 years. How can you just walk out on our family? On me? On Daddy? We may not be rich and have loads of money growing up, we made it. We made it by God and Love. Prayer was the big thing growing up. How can you hurt your own little sister? So many questions are popping in my head. I guess I'll never understand, or know the answers. I just hope the rest of your life goes well. Cause I don't wanna try anymore. You got my hopes up, you broke my heart, and for most you are missing out on my life.